This is a review for Harry Potter and The Cursed Child The Play, it contains spoilers.
Hermione Granger-Weasley is one bad ass witch.
Older Hermione is everything we imagined her to be. intelligent, strong and above all, nice. She takes no one’s BS, including Ron’s. And she’s Minister for Magic.
Ron and Hermione are still together.
Some of you may have already known this from the cast photos. But this is a big disappointment for Harry/Hermione fans. They are constantly doing public displays of affection, go on about renewing their vows and talk about having babies.
Harry and Ginny are together too.
But they have issues. They are both easily triggered Gryffindors with a need to save the world, and that’s going to create some problems.
Harry is Head of Magical Law Enforcement
Not only did he live out his aspiration of becoming an Auror, he also became the Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement. But he still has to answer to Minister Hermione Granger-Weasley.
Harry is not dad of the year.
The play showcases Harry’s turbulent relationship with his son, Albus. His son feels like his dad’s expectations of him are too high. While Harry feels like his kid isn’t trying hard enough. And they’re always fighting. At one point Harry says he, “wishes he was never born.”
Ron is still making everyone LOL.
He’s always telling jokes to lighten the mood. But he’s also very protective of his wife and family, still holds a grudge against Draco Malfoy, and remains one of the loyalest friends anyone could dream of.
Rose Granger-Weasley combines the best of both worlds
There wasn’t much of her in the play, but what we do get to see is wonderful. The kid has Hermione’s authority and Ron’s loyalty. She’s the top of her class and is a stellar Quidditch player.
Scorpius develops a crush on Rose from their first encounter on the Hogwarts Express, and by the end of the play’s second half, he was almost successful in asking her out.
Albus Severus Potter was put into SLYTHERIN.
Do you remember in the epilogue of Deathly Hallows when Albus tells Harry that he’s afraid of being sorted into Slytherin. Well, his worst nightmare came true. And Harry turns his back on him.
Albus isn’t into Hogwarts.
Despite Harry always telling him how amazing it is, when he get there, he’s not so convinced. Albus only has one friend – Scorpius Malfoy – and isn’t a good student.
There’s rumours circulating that Scorpius Malfoy is Voldemort’s son.
Since he was born, his entire family were plagued by rumours that he is actually the son of Voldemort.
The rumour goes like this: In an attempt to bring Voldemort back to power, the Death Eaters used the last remaining Time-Turner to send Malfoy’s wife, Astoria, back to the time Voldemort was alive, and have his child. The Malfoy family all deny that this is the case.
The play gives us glimpses into a lot of alternate realities, and they all suck.
Basically the wizards meddle with time and bad things happen.
Abus hears Amos Diggory asking Harry to use the last remaining Time-Turner to go back to the Triwizard Tournament to save Cedric. Harry refused. Albus wants to teach his dad a lesson and grants Amos’s wish with the help of his niece, Delphi Doggory.
Albus, Scorpius and Delphi mess with the Triwizard Tournament to save Cedric and shit goes DOWN.
In the first alternate reality, Albus is sorted into Gryffindor, Hermione teaches Defence Against the Dark Arts at Hogwarts and Ron is married to Padma Patil.
Albus walks into the classroom and tells Hermione that she should be married to Ron. She freaks out and flips tables, because Ron is married to Patil. But Ron and Hermione meet on the staircase and have a moment in this reality.
Albus and Scorpius try to correct their first mistake, but things get crazier.
When they return back to the present, Albus is nowhere to be found and Dolores Umbridge is the headmistress at Hogwarts. In this reality, Harry Potter was slain in the Battle of Hogwarts. Voldemort reigns, Muggle-borns live in constant terror, and every conversations end with the phrase “for Voldemort and valour.” The first half of the play ends with them going back in time again.
In this reality, Ron and Hermone are the most wanted wizards in the world – and Severus Snape is still alive.
The 3 remaining members of the Order of Phoenix – Ron, Hermione and Severus Snaps – are still going strong and are trying to overthrow Voldemort. When they meet Scorpius who tells them there’s a possibility they can go back in time and save Harry, they do everything they can to help him.
Ron and Hermione aren’t together in this reality either. They do confess their love for each other, but they’re killed by Dementors.
Then everything is fine for 2 minutes until we discover Voldemort actually has a kid.
Albus and Scorpius go to Amos to ask where his niece is and he says he doesn’t have one. Turns out, Delphi Diggory is the daughter of Voldemort. She was born right before the Battle of Hogwarts. She’s an orphan and is now trying to avenge her father, by going back in time and bringing him back.
There’s a prophecy referencing an unseeing parent. And basically states that Voledemort can rise again.
Delphi is trying to go back to that fateful night at Goodrich’s Hollow to save him.
Harry has a chance to save his parents but doesn’t take it.
Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Draco, Albus and Scorpious go back to October 31st, 1981 to stop Delphi from saving Voldemort. They succeed but they see him walking towards James and Lily Potter’s cottage. But he doesn’t stop him. Cause he doesn’t want to mess with time.
And everyone cried in the audience.
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