Alison Gold Chinese Food Serves Up Asian Realness


Alison Gold Chinese Food showcases her love and adoration for the culinary confection. We can all relate!
Gold nails it when she says her cravings hit after”clubbing” and “balling.” How can someone so young be so insightful?
Engaging in spontaneous vandalism of city property, it’s suffice to say she gets a little crazy when the hunger pains hit. But she’s in luck, there’s a Chinese restaurant nearby. She busts out Jay Z-esque dance moves as she orders a spread of  “beautiful” Chinese Food.

But wait, the fortune cooking tells her she is going to meet a panda. Turns out the panda was there the entire time. Watching… waiting

Her and the panda frolick, tickle each other, and hallucinate about Chow Mein in the sky.

The panda is invited back to her place where he reveals himself as none other than Patrice Wilson, half of the dynamic duo that makes up Ark Music Factory. The ones who brought us Rebecca Black’s Friday.

He raps about Monopoly and broccoli and the video gives us some Geisha’s at the end. Interesting, since Geisha’s are Japanese.

Check out the video above where I review the video.


  1. Patrice is no longer with Ark. He’s doing his own thing at PMWLive. And doing it horribly. I worked for him for a brief stint and I still don’t know whether he believes in what he’s doing or is just trolling the world. But seriously, what kind of parents are letting him run around with and tickle their pubescent kids?


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